eSPECIALly Ableist ("Special Needs")

Mention of incontinence - may be TMI

Something I've experienced and witnessed that I want to talk about: many able-bodied and nondisabled people calling disabled people (mostly physically disabled people) "special needs" (and, more often than not, painting that as a bad thing and/or something to pity).

There might be disabled people who identify as special needs. But many do not. That's what I mean (in the disability sense) when I say ask how people identify. You don't know if someone identifies as special needs or disabled or something else if you don't ask.

But, also, the term "special needs" is completely inaccurate.

Here's a metaphor I love (I'm not sure if I heard it from someone else or if I came up with it): an able-bodied or nondisabled person and I are at a hotel (I am a non-ambulatory wheelchair user). We both need to get to the 2nd floor. An able-bodied or nondisabled person can use the stairs. I can't. I need to use the elevator. My need isn't special, the execution is just different.

Here's a real life example: I experience incontinence. I have no control over when I pee and/or poop. As a result, I wear Pull-ups (basically an "adult diaper") that I change. I'm still going to the bathroom. How it happens just looks different to how some other people know or experience.

But what about someone needing to do something(s) that they only have to do because they're disabled? It doesn't matter. Every single human being - disabled or not - has the need for things to survive and live.

Again, the needs aren't any more or less special. It's just the fulfilling of any of those needs that might look different.