Slur Your Words (Ableist Slurs)

Warning: Multiple specific ableist words mentioned

I had a realization recently: Most ableist words should be considered and classified as slurs but they’re not because of ableism.

Words like: crazy, insane, dumb, stupid, moronic, idiotic, idiot, moron, lame, freak (in any form), handicap (in any form), crip (in any form).

Nowadays these words each have additional, non-ableist meanings attached to them. But I believe this is because we [as a society] haven’t stopped saying them.

When I say slur I mean is just that. Like the r-word is a definite, no questions asked ableist slur.

Mirriam-Webster defines the noun as “a derogatory or insulting term applied to a particular group of people”.

“Crazy”, “insane”, “dumb”, “stupid”, “moronic, “idiotic”, “idiot”, and “moron” have all been - and still are - used against people with various mental disabilities. These words are used to demean and put down people (and, often, to downplay someone’s experience(s)). These words are also often used to gaslight people.

“Crip” (in any form) and “handicap” (in any form) has been and is used against people with various physical disabilities. I’ve seen it used as an insult and in place of the word “disabled”. I (a wheelchair user) am called these things a lot. As an insult like I said, but, also, because someone doesn’t want to say “disabled” - even when I’ve asked them to. Many places and people even still call things “handicap accessible” and/or “handicap parking”.

I have found that “lame” and any form of “freak” can go both ways. Those words are, again, often used to demean and insult disabled people.

I understand many people use many of these words in ways that they may not see as having to do with disability. Honestly, though, then just use other words. Why resort to words known to cause harm and suffering?

I understand some people self-identify with one or multiple of these words. But if you’re not using it for yourself and you know it causes harm, why say it?

Here are some substitutions for these words I and others around me favor:

• Instead of “crazy” and/or “insane” you could say “wild” and/or “ridiculous” and/or “silly” and/or “preposterous” and/or “outlandish” and/or “the bad C word” (stolen from Angela Giarratana - thank you, Angela)

• Instead of “dumb” and/or “stupid” and/or “moronic” and/or “idiotic” you could say “not smart” and/or “bad idea” and/or “[willfully] ignorant” and/or “[willfully] uninformed” and/or “uneducated”

• Instead of “idiot” and/or “moron” you could say what I listed for “dumb” and “stupid” and “moronic” and “idiotic”

• Instead of “lame” you could say “boring” and/or “no[t] fun” and/or “unexciting” and/or “not exciting” and/or “nerdy” and/or “not my cup of tea” and/or “not my thing”

• Instead of saying “freak” and/or “freak[ed] out” and/or “freaking out” and/or “freak of nature” you could say “disabled” and/or “not my type” and/or “scare[d]” and/or “scaring” and/or “panic[ked]” and/or “panicking” and/or “fricking” and/or a cuss word

• Instead of “crip” and/or “crippled” and/or “crippling” and/or “handicap” and/or “handicapped” you could say “disabled” and/or “wheelchair user” and/or “disadvantage[d]/put at a disadvantage” and/or “harm” and/or “hurt” and/or simply how someone identifies (it’s okay to ask) - you can also just say “accessible” and/or “wheelchair accessible”

• Insead of saying any of these things, you could say what you actually mean and not resort to saying something ableist

There might be more words I believe should be slurs. If I think of them and/or any more are brought to my attention, I’ll be sure to add them.

(The things in brackets [] show letters or words you can add to whatever word to create a different word or phrase - so “no[t] fun” means you could say “no fun” and/or “not fun”.)

(I understand it can take time and work to get any of these words out of your vocabulary - I personally still sometimes say “stupid” and/or “idiot” when I’m angry and I’ve been doing this work for 3 or 4 years.)

I’ll be honest: right now I feel incredibly helpless. I want to change this, I want to get this information widespread and out there to more people, but I’m not entirely sure how. So I’m writing.

I also realize I can’t do this alone. For this to change I cannot be the only person to speak about this.

I’m sorry it’s been a minute since I’ve posted on here. I’ve been working on a book (about consent, privacy, and respect) and posting on my Instagram.